When I got home today Carol said I looked tired. Why don't I sit down and relax? She said she has pulled a few things out for dinner. In the kitchen I find grandpa trying to figure out how to cook a frozen breakfast sausage patty while eating potato salad from the container. What we eventually arrive at is a plate (!) with a sausage sandwich with tomato, what I couldn't salvage from the salt and pepper on the potato salad and some pineapple. Carol came into the kitchen during part of this and left quickly. The past few days she has been trying very hard to be in control, and when I assert any kind of authority she either lashes out, or disappears. On Saturday she even said to me when I asked her how her day was going, "all I do is clean, cook and work." For a moment of my self involvement I was thinking, "you cook?" but then the real question arrived, "where do you work, Carol?" "At the golf course just north of here." I looked at the calendar to find that she wrote that she had to work yesterday (Sunday) and today. I'm not sure about today, but I know she didn't "go to work" yesterday. Am I missing something here?
An hour after Grandpa had finished dinner, Carol started offering me all sorts of food and mentioned seeing what Tommy wanted for dinner. She seemed confused when I told her we had already eaten. She says finally, "well, I'm going to have some potato salad. Do you want some?" and then the conversation starts over. I finally had to have another dinner in order to get her to eat a real meal. As in, "I guess I am pretty hungry. Thanks for reminding me. Ooops. I heated up too much. Do you want some? Oh, and while we're at it, this pineapple looks great, doesn't it?" It's a weird charade to pretend that she's helping me when really I'm helping her.
There's no hope for me and Cynthia being two separate identities. I thought it was just me that was confused as her, but I went to visit her at her work Saturday night, and she told me that Grandpa mistakes her for me all the time. She says most of her visit they ask her about MauMau and tell her how pretty "her"cat is. Even Carol asked her if she could turn off the fan in "her" room. The fan in my room is actually an air purifier, and I guess I should be glad someone is getting asked at least. Everyday I come home and it's off (even though I keep it on low in the morning) and sometimes things are moved. Little things, like a shirt I decided against and threw on my bed is folded. I tell her that I know it's her house, but I think I've earned the right to not have my things messed with when I'm away. I explain the air purifier keeps away the second hand smoke from the kitchen so I don't wake up coughing. "What? I never went into your room!" She'll say aghast. Then, it will happen the next day. I'm pretty sure neither MauMau or my Grandfather is folding my clothes while I'm gone, but if I had to choose the more likely, I guess I'll have to start scolding Mau.
I am becoming more concerned about Carol's ability to maintain her grip on things in general these days... It seems like it is morphing to another level beyond from even when you arrived there. If she actually shows up at the golf course to try and work, we are in serious trouble.
ReplyDeleteOn a side note, I like your new profile picture!
You know, she does whatever comes naturally to her, except a little modified. She fixes bowls of ice cream but doesn't put together meals, she feeds the cat but forgets when she last saw him, whatever bills somehow make it to her, she tries to pay, etc.
ReplyDeleteThanks about my profile picture.